How COVID-19 Jolts the Modern Dating and Loneliness Dynamic
It wasn’t that long ago that people might have given you strange looks if you said you’d had a date via video chat. Now, using these tools is commonplace in the world of dating.
COVID-19 has not only sent a jolt, piercing the modern dating world, but it’s also upended it. That means many people are quickly learning how to date within the realm of a pandemic.
However, others struggle with this “new normal” and are finding themselves more lonely than ever before. Take heart; there are ways to combat loneliness and still meet someone special, even with COVID-19.
The COVID-19 and Dating Combo
COVID-19 presents several challenges for singles and modern dating. The whole idea of dating someone is to get closer to them — physically and emotionally.
However, COVID-19 protocols require six feet of distancing between people who don’t live in the same household. That throws a massive wrench into the gears of a first date!
Since we were told to stay apart, we’ve had less social connection with other people in the last few months. The result is that we feel more isolated and alone.
How Loneliness Can Lead to Depression
If left unchecked, loneliness could lead to depression. We need to feel connected to others — but there’s something more to it.
Depression often arises in people because they have lost hope. With this pandemic, it could be a long time before modern dating returns to any semblance of what it was like before COVID-19. That causes people to lose hope for the future. When you lose hope, you don’t believe that anything will change. So why bother trying?
Pushing Back Against Loneliness
If the answer to loneliness is a connection with others, singles can adapt to this new reality. If we are going to get through this crisis, we all must find ways to get those basic human needs met. That includes combating loneliness.
For singles, one route to connecting with other singles is through dating websites and apps. These were already popular before the pandemic, but their use has dramatically increased since the start of the pandemic.
One of the advantages of online dating is that everyone is there for the same reason: to meet someone new. But now everyone wants to feel connected to others. Another bonus of online dating is that you can schedule several video-chat dates in one evening. This approach increases the opportunity of meeting someone you like.
When It’s Time to Meet “IRL”
Another new dynamic of dating in the modern world is deciding when and how to meet “in real life.” However, the advice of keeping things simple for a first date still applies now. For example:
Meet together outside in a public place.
Go for a long walk together.
If you decide to take off masks, stay six feet or more apart from each other when outside.
Keep the conversation casual. You both don’t have to be each other’s therapist and process how the pandemic has impacted you on the first date!
A first date is for meeting and deciding if there’s any chemistry between the two of you. As things progress and you get to know each other, you both may choose to be closer physically.
Strong communication will be crucial and understanding what the ground rules are. For instance, both of you might decide to meet but will have a COVID-19 test before the date and choose to isolate for a certain period.
The pandemic has undoubtedly caused us all to feel a little more isolated. Yet singles may feel this even more strongly than those already in relationships. However, singles can meet and get to know other people. The key is communication and doing things in a thoughtful way.
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If you struggle with loneliness or are unsure about navigating this new dating landscape, contact me today for psychotherapy support.